1. |
Intro
00:51
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2. |
Estrogen (The HRT Song)
03:09
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[VERSE]
I’m crying in my bedroom again
Cause I don’t know what’s wrong with me
Maybe it’s my sexuality
I think I might be non-binary
Don’t think anyone can ever
Know that I am transgender
What am I supposed to do?
I think I might just tell you
[CHORUS]
How can I survive with all this inside?
I think I might go ahead and take your advice.
[VERSE]
Everybody knows now,
and I am so relieved now,
but I still have a beard, flat chest, rough skin,
I wanna be more feminine
They say looks aren't everything
But I'm just trying to be me
Or at least a little happy
So I’m going on estrogen
[CHORUS]
For so long I thought it could never be done
But now my life feels like it has been redone
[VERSE]
After months of waiting,
And a bit of complaining,
My patience was festerin'
But today I'm on estrogen
My boobs are growing
My beard is thinning
My head is spinning
Cause today I'm on estrogen
[CHORUS
(Sing/play fancy)
For so long I thought it could never be done
But now my life feels like it has been redone
(pause to get slow and quiet)
[BRIDGE]
We're all scared of the unknown
That fear for me was hormones
But those months of crying should have been
Months that I was on estrogen
(4 counts of silence then really intense)
[CHORUS]
For so long I thought it could never be done
But now my life feels like it has been redone
And now because I could no longer postpone
my gender, I leapt headfirst into the unknown,
I will never wonder what could’ve been
cause I’m taking estrogen
Played on Ukelele: C-G-Am-F-C repeat for whole song.
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3. |
Sheep (The Church Song)
03:19
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(do the bridge chords as intro)
In the middle of a city that no one sees
Stands a towering church with a spear-like steeple
And every other day the pastor
Gathers a large, stoic herd of people
In the corner of the church that no one sees
Stood a short, skinny boy with black, dead eyes,
And every other day the pastor
Failed to hear the short skinny boy’s cries
This boy had gone to church his entire life,
And to massive applause, accepted God at seven.
They pushed him into line, drilled into his mind,
Gave him a book so fine, called How to Get to Heaven.
The smiling elders told him:
BRIDGE:
“Take a leap
Of faith, lest you want to sleep
In hell because we are the sheep
Of God, who is the shepherd!”
But as the years flew by, a problem arose,
‘cause on every rose there are piercing thorns.
This boy who’d been told that he was a sheep,
Looked into the mirror, saw that he had horns.
The large stoic herd of people
Cast him away and slit his throat.
They told him that his horns meant that he was evil –
Unfortunately for him,
(C, D, Em)
he would never know,
That he was only a goat.
In the middle of self-righteousness that no one sees
Lay a short, bloody goat, their quivering catch.
And today and every other day the pastor
Gathers the sinful in a herd to dispatch
(optional)
BRIDGE:
I want to die
Because my people cry
Antichrist at every lie
That they find
Played on acoustic guitar
Em-Am-G
Bridge: Dm-Fmaj7-C-E
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4. |
Back in Highschool
02:52
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(soft)
*I wake up wishing I could wear a dress
And then I remember that I’ve already addressed
The problem that I repressed for so
Long
*That I can hardly express the
excess of progress that I
repossessed to stop feeling
so depressed
**Back in highschool I was a ticking time bomb
Full of constant tension that my self invention
was just a pathetic pretension masking
the bit of me I was too scared to mention to myself
And I hate that I didn’t wear a dress to
Prom so as I danced with my
Friends
I let myself fade away into the
-Lingerie that I kept locked away
deep inside my ugly brain
But the next day
I wore that lingerie
to an anime convention and
I looked kawaii
--
*I hate that I masterbate to fetishized
Transvestites and I hate that the rape that
I downplay traumatized me less than
-the church that made me compartmentalize
My self in order to exist
My internalized
transphobia is a fossilized
record of the dystopia
Of my mind,
cast aside catastrophized the
euphoria that I never realized
I could have if I just stopped
-hating myself long enough to feel the words
Viva La Gloria
--
*The lace on my hairy leg that I dissect
Like a dying insect makes me erect
and I feel so much
-shame that the same thing that made me hate myself
so much kept me alive for so
Long the last time I stole a pair of
Panties from the laundry basket
of my home, I never gave them
back
The last time my heart oozed with
orgasmic ecstasy and I
breathlessly arrived at such a
transcendent pleasantry
I stuck my fingers in my
mouth and tried to puke out the guilt
That the church had fed me all
my life
--
*By the time I broke the doors of my college
I was eighteen and ready to climb
the insurmountable pantomime
That was the reconstruction of my
Temple the sublime
sensation of relief that I felt
the day I was rebuilt enough to stop
feeling guilt for being who I am and who I was
never able to defeat
--
I believe
was like a coral reef
rebounding from humanity’s
neglect and grief
*The bits of self destruction that survived my
reconstruction will always stay as a
reminder that I am and always will be
Gay and
trans and that I’m here to stay and nothing that gets
- in my way will ever destroy me the
way I was destroyed
back in highschool.
(End on an Emaj)
Capo 3
Em G D B
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5. |
Thanks for Loving Me
02:46
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6. |
||||
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Now here’s the story of an Old man who
tried to save this petty land
and three others
who came and gave a hand
Their names don’t mean a thing
But what they did changed
The course of the Earth
Forevermore for the better
Some aliens landed in the
Ocean and they were drowning
And the old man came and gave a hand
And they thanked him in the sand
He and me and two others
Smuggled them across the land
But we were stopped by two men
Who worked for the CIA
We snuck the aliens away
Before the men could have their way
Cause we let them have their way
With us, there was no other way.
The old man walked up to me, and said
“I turned us in. I was the right thing to do.”
My girlfriend said “I did things that my
Friends back home would never believe.”
[extra 2]
We all smiled and we cried
As we said our final goodbyes.
And here I am, alone again
Awaiting my final judgement, so
[extra 4]
Hey mr. hangman,
can you be there alone?
There’s no need to hear the voices
Of the ones who think they’re grown
As we stay in the country
And we ride through the wind,
I can hear the ugly voices
Of the men who’ll never know
Of the fun and the sorrow
That has led us here today
In this room all together,
-Having one last big hoorah
I have traveled far and wide
Gone on adventures with my friends
And now here I stand alone
On this old basketball court
As the sirens wail behind us
And the future cries ahead
I will never forget you
Even long after you’re dead
Oooooo (x2) (brass instruments play us out in recording)
G Em Am D
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7. |
The Saddest Way
03:10
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F, C, G, Am
I’m standing on a cliffside
Water crashing below
And above the stars shine bright
And the grass on my toes
And the wind on my face
And i feel like a disgrace
Cause the waves crash on the shore
As I’m standing here unsure
No, no more hestitating
I run and i jump and i’m
B
Levitating
Em, Am, G, B7
I wanna float away
I wanna fade away
I wanna be forgotten in the saddest way
Now I’m flying so high
I fly past the sky
Past the ISS and the moon
Don’t you dare to wave goodbye
you’ll see me again soon
I can see the sand on Mars
Then I zoom past the asteroid belt
And from there Saturn’s moon ain’t far
This is a way I’ve never felt
Now I’m past the Milky way
Past Andromeda too
Cause I dug a wormhole babe
Just to get the fuck away from you
I wanna float away
I wanna fade away
I wanna be forgotten in the saddest way (x2 then whoa x2)
I wanna show up to my funeral
And see no one there
I wanna give my own eulogy
to an empty room
I wanna give the concert of my life
To an empty room
I wanna bless the dinner meal
To an empty house
If u can key change, its Bm, Em, D, F#
I wanna float away
I wanna fade away
I wanna be forgotten in the saddest way (x2 then whoa x2)
(then go crazy til you feel like ending)
End on the highest octave of Em (its the last dot)
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Supernova Plant City, Florida
I play acoustic guitar, ukelele, and sing about queer shit. Apparently that maens I'm folk/punk/indie/queercore.
I just like making fun tunes.
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